Dear Tiger Woods

[Ed. note: This is the transcribed message left on Tiger Woods' answering machine at 3:32 a.m. on July 21.]

Hey, Tiger,

It's your loyal fans here. Sorry to be calling so late, but we haven't been able to sleep. We've been thinking a lot lately and things just aren't the same as they've been for the past 15 years. And frankly, we are fed up with your shit.

The past year and a half has been like a bad relationship to us: you've promised that you were going to change, saying that you got away from your roots and teachings and that it's time to get back to your true self. We listened as you lied, promising that you would make a comeback and all would be OK.

And we took the bait. We wanted to believe.

We know that what you've gone through the past year and a half has been rough––you were caught in a major cheating scandal, lost your wife, your swing coach bolted, some of your major endorsement deals were dropped, Nike cut a big chunk of its deal, your career is in shambles and you can't stay healthy. But to add to the whirlwind, you split with the one person who could arguably be one of the last saving graces for your career, your caddy, Stevie Williams.

We were skeptical when Williams first took the bag of Adam Scott in this year's U.S. Open, of course, but we tried to write it off as you weren't playing and Williams just wanted to caddy. And, yeah, so what Williams grabbed Scott's bag again at the British Open, big deal, right?! You weren't there either, so it was OK, although the fear in the back of our minds told us otherwise.

But now you pull this shit of dumping Stevie, citing another "change" when all the others have obviously worked out so well. Cut the bullshit, Tiger, we know it's just another pawn move in your drastic downfall.

*Sighs*

So go on and keep telling yourself all is well in Tigerland, where you are truly getting back to yourself and that once your knee and achilles heals and your swing changes take effect and you find a new caddy and another great swing coach that you'll be back to the prominent force you once were.

But us fans, we are calling your bluff, we're sick of the abuse.

*Click*